Goals

I'm running a mile again. It doesn't sound like much, but this is where I left off before the wedding. In fact, I ran my first mile two days before the wedding and then didn't run or hike or do ANYTHING (except a little yoga and a lot of eating and drinking) for a solid month. It feels good to get back to my old "healthier" ways and push myself again! Kristin and I will resume our weekly hikes, starting tomorrow. I wonder how far up Morrison Canyon or the Pleasanton Ridge I will actually be able to climb the first few attempts? This should be interesting (and challenging). Hopefully, the additional cardiovascular work out will help me increase my running time/distance!

And more good news; I smell Fall in the air! This means I have 10 whole months before next year's bathing suit season! : ) While I didn't actually get to parade around (at least not in public) in a bikini this year, I'm pretty happy with where I am and what I did accomplish. For me, it's the effort and perseverance that really matter, not so much the end result. I didn't give up and I didn't let myself down.

I think that goals are something we should strive for, but if we attain all of our goals too easily, maybe we're not setting them high enough? Goals should be difficult to achieve. They should make us put in a good amount of effort, allow us to challenge ourselves and push through obstacles, both physical and emotional, while at the same time not be so difficult that we feel defeated before we even start.

On the other hand, I believe that it's perfectly "OK" for goals to be "fluid". Lord knows I adjusted my goals as our wedding day approached: Lose 25 pounds and have my dress taken in an entire size! Ok, lose 15 pounds and maybe a little adjustment on the dress? Ok, just fit into the @%$# damn $&*@# -ing DRESS!! And guess what? I achieved my goal! I wouldn't call that "copping out" or "failing", I call it being realistic, knowing my limits and abilities, and adjusting my goals accordingly, as I go. It's self-preservation really. If I'm not even close to my originally set goal, I could a) beat myself up over it and feel horrible about myself or b) adjust my goal to something I can come close to, or even actually achieve, and feel great about it!

Equally as important; enjoying the journey and learning from it! One thing I didn't have to learn (because I've always known) is that, while I can be pretty tenacious and go after the things I want (goals included), with a fairly constant degree of enthusiasm (just ask my mom about the pony thing), I tend to err on the side of "least effort required" (i.e. laziness). So to be successful, my goals need to be reasonable, reeeaaalllly reasonable.

I read a quote in Runner's World magazine about aging: "Making peace with the aging process is so much easier when you're in motion." (Kristin Armstrong) I have to agree. The same goes for body image. When you are in motion, you develop an appreciation for your body that transcends the need to look a certain way, or try to achieve unrealistic (for your body OR personality type) goals.

I'm 42. This is the time in my life where self-acceptance trumps self-critical. Effort and joy are in balance. Physical motion and quiet reflection are given their turn in equal measure. All of these ingredients go into the pot, and whatever comes out of it will be delicious! That is my goal.