For Realsies This Time!!

You may recall that in my July 1st post, I decided, after 18 months of various twists, turns, experiments, and road blocks, that the winning-est weight loss program for me was Weight Watchers, but with my own personal twist, of course.

Then I managed to spend the next two months vacationing, camping, partying, crafting, meditating, road tripping, basically everything but focusing on my weight. Was it refreshing? Not as refreshing as I hoped it would be. Self-acceptance is for the birds.

Seriously though, I did keep up the with the basics of my "feel good" routine - lots of yoga, some swimming, healthy eating for the most part. Every once in a while, I'd have a knee jerk reaction and go "full protein!" for a week, or half heartedly "start tracking" again. Momentarily.

Old habits die hard.

The good news - I didn't re-gain all of the 12 pounds it took me a year to lose during my two month "dieting hiatus" - maybe just 5 pounds.

So now that vacation season is over, I'm back on track. And for real this time. Oh, and not with my "own twist" (That so doesn't work! It cracks me up that I keep trying to whine and wheedle my way out of following the rules and putting forth the effort required to get the results I claim to want so badly!)

Enough of that.

I'm following the rules and sticking to the program. I started this past Monday, but today is day one of my first "full week" back on track. I managed to lose two of the five pounds I gained over the past couple of months. It kind of pisses me off that I still have another week or two to go just to get back to where I was. Oh well. Lesson learned!

Goal Weight: 140
Current Weight: 161 (sigh)

The Plan: Weight Watchers
Key Words: Yoga, Hiking, Walking, Meditating, Clean Eating, Fresh Produce, Lean Protein, Cooking, Loving Myself As I Am Every Step Of The Way But Also Loving Myself Enough To Give Myself The Gift Of Being My Best.

Whew.

Oh...a side note. I cut my own hair again! Into a shorter "pixie" cut. I think I may A) Get a Flowbee hair cutting system or B) Just go pay for a fucking hair cut already!

Quickie! (AKA Epic Road Trip Part 1)

I've got five minutes for a quick blog post!

I think our road trip to Seattle and Bend can be considered "epic" for many reasons, and as such, it deserves it's own photo montage, set to music, of course. But in the meantime, here's a quick breakdown.

First stop, Grants Pass and the Hellgate Canyon Jet Ski Excursion on the Rogue River. Super fun...If you ever drive through  the area, I highly recommend this! The photos make it look tame, but the jet boats can fly across water just 6 inches deep, they can go up rapids and they can hit 80 MPH (or is it 50...).  The 360's are also fun. Wet..but fun!

Next, we pulled into Portland on the way to Seattle and had dinner at McCormick and Schmicks. Not bad for a chain restaurant, although the scenery was probably better than the food (we dined outdoors on the patio overlooking the harbor). We both ordered the Lobster Trio:

And on to Seattle! Besides being a super cool place that contains some of my most favorite people on earth, the delicious food inspired me to return to the Farmers Market this Saturday and get back to clean eating. I'm only up a couple of pounds from when I left, and I think that's mostly due to the Moussakas at Yanni's in Seattle and the Pizza and Beer of 10 Barrel in Bend. Other than that....I kept my wits about me.

(10 Barrel Brewing Co. Bend, Or)

Can I just mention coffee? Seattle makes the best coffee EVER. Grateful Bread and All City Coffee were a few of the places we tried. There were more, but the names escape me now. If I lived in Seattle, I would be drinking way too much coffee! I would also have beautiful skin and clown hair.

(All City Coffee in the Georgetown District of Seattle)

(Cute sign I saw at another coffee shop in Ballard)

(My sister in law Nancy - we walked to Grateful Bread one morning - and me with glowing skin and clown hair.)

We sailed in the Puget Sound!

(An "artsy" photo - I think Rob took this shot.)

My brother and I flew in a 1940 open cockpit bi-plane (yeah, I know...ME!). I have a certificate to prove it! I don't know what came over me, but (in part) the thought of wearing a bomber jacket and a leather helmet with goggles....I just HAD to! Isn't she a beauty?

(My brother, Art. Doesn't he look like a pilot?)

(Wait a minute! Is that a zip tie???!?)

(My old neighborhood!)

We visited with friends and family, created some great meals and memories. It was fantastic!

(Captain Nancy)

(Rob, Ramon & Dawn)

And I have to mention somewhere in here, that while cooking at home, especially with good friends, is my favorite...and the Gorgonzola chicken, Bread Salad, and grilled vegetables with a loganberry reduction we made at Ramon and Dawn's was mouth watering...and my sister in law's eggplant, basil sandwiches on rustic baguette were delicious...my absolute favorite would have to be the Cuban sandwiches from Paseo's across from the Shilshole Marina in Seattle:

(No sandwich image available due to the speed at which they were consumed.)

It was time to leave the Emerald City and it's endless offering of exquisite Coffee, Pastries, Foodies, Friends, and Family. It was with sadness, but also excitement, that we travelled on to Bend, Oregon - land of tax free shopping, outdoor adventure, and fun! We did some camping on Wickiup Reservoir, where we just drove up to a "primitive" campsite on the water and set up camp! For FREE!

(The view from our tent.)

We even did a little bit of "extreme" geocaching (in swimsuits and flip flops, not recommended!).

We had some great times with Emily and Glen's friends Jimmy and Joy. They have a game room with ping pong, hoola hoop, pool, Centipede, Darts, Rock 'em Sock 'em, Hungry Hungry Hippo, and a random game from the 60's called "Swivel":

And I would be remiss if I did not take advantage of the EXCELLENT consignment stores in Bend (seriously...they rock!). And no tax? I found a "gently used" pair of J Crew brown leather riding boots for $40!!! Here's me happy:

Of course all good things must come to an end. So long Bend, Oregon...time to head back to California...

Overalls. And The Line Between Fantasy and Reality.

I'm going to go out on a fashion limb here and state publicly that I really want a pair of overalls.

There is that well known rule that if you wear a fashion the first time it comes around, you should definitely pass on it the second (or third) time. But I'm pretty sure I already broke that rule.

I wore them as a kid in the 70's (the striped train conductor ones!). Then as a semi-androgynous, grunge, free-music-festival goer in the early to mid 90's (think Bridget Fonda in the movie "Singles"). I even stretched them into the late 90's (maternity wear) and early 2000's (comfy "casual day at work" attire)! I lived in those things for a decade!

Besides, can overalls really be considered "fashion"? It seems like there should be a few items of clothing that are exempt from the "wear it once" rule. Culotts are another great example of clothing trends that never go away (even if they should). Go ahead, Google Image "Culotts" and find me a decade free of them.

Anyway....I should give it up....

But I feel like I never wore them "quite right" back in the day. I want another chance.

The problem is my serious lack of perception.

In my MIND, I would look like THIS:

 Or this - minus the hat. How totally freaking cute in a "hobo chic" way!

Sadly - I'm afraid I would end up looking more like this:

Or at least like this: (Similar to how I "rocked the overall" in the late 90's/2000's. Not well, I'm afraid.)

What do you think? Shouldn't I get another chance? Third time's a charm! (another fashion rule, right?)

itchystomachoveralldietbeadcachecompassion!

What's in YOUR brain?

July 20th was my last blog entry. Hmmmm....tap tap tap...hmmmmm..... (figuring out what to write and wondering why I've got nothin'.)

Here are a few thoughts that randomly float into my mind. What better place to jot down random, floaty thoughts than a blog?

Of course thought #1 is my obsession du jour:

1) I'm tired of yo-yo dieting.

By that, I mean, yo-yo-ing from No Carb to Weight Watchers, to a combination of the two, with little, if any results. Then giving up for a week and trying my own "Yoga-Diet" plan of "celebrating my body" and "eating intuitively", only to discover that the way I "celebrate my body" is to lounge around all day, admiring my legs, while ignoring my growing waistline. And "intuitive eating", well let's just say that my body "intuitively" wants cheese. Lots of it.

I'm in a tug of war with myself - hating to suffer defeat on the scale, but also trying to just "be".

*sigh* 

Apparently, it's not like me to just "be". I've got to...to...what? I don't know, but something. Improve somehow. "Become Thin" doesn't seem like too lofty a goal and as much as I would love to give it up, it's been alluding me for so long, that now I'm just mad. I am tenacious if nothing else. I will beat a dead horse deader. (What a terrible saying! Who came up with that? And why am I not deleting it from this post?)

I remember, before I quit smoking for good, I told myself, "My GOD! I do NOT want to spend my ENTIRE life trying to quit smoking! It's miserable. Just do it for God's sake and be done with it!"

So I did.

Now I'm thinking, "My GOD! I do NOT want to spend my ENTIRE life trying to lose weight! It's miserable. Just do it for God's sake and be done with it!"

Quitting smoking was easier....and that took 20 years.

So I think...being that I'm going on vacation for a week...I will just "be" for a week. Try it on for size. Give it the ol' college try. Re-assess (and maybe weigh in) when I return. I will make one promise to myself - I'm going to be reasonable. No junk/garbage food, because I know how that makes me feel. But that's the only rule.

2) Thought number 2 is that I really wish I had more going on in my head right now. But I'm not going to beat myself up over it. Like my body, I'm also trying to improve my mind. Not by being smarter (that train left the station), but by opening it. Opening my mind to wisdom, clarity, compassion, etc.  Ah...maybe this is why I obsess on weight and diet. It's easier.



Anyhoo - I'm totally into making bracelets now. I'm calling them "Buddha Bracelets":

Each one comes with a little note referencing an aspect of the Noble Eight-Fold Path. They don't have a clasp, but I suppose you could put one on yourself if you really want to. Rob was trying to get me to put clasps on them. I had to explain that I purposely want them to be "Impermanent" - they will fall off, break, or get annoying and be cut off by the wearer. Impermanent by design!

Oooh! Maybe I should call them "Impermanent by Design" instead of "Buddha Bracelets"? What do you think?

I have time for a few more quick thoughts:

3) I want to get a pair of overalls. Probably lame, I know. They're so 90's. But I fondly remember the lack of muffin top in those things. Just brilliant.

4) Oooh! I love geocaching!

5) My stomach feels "itchy", what's for lunch?

6) This is so lame...am I gonna publish this post? Stupid question.

There - those 6 thoughts are the entire contents of my head at this.very.moment. FASCINATING!