Super Quick!

Two pounds in two weeks! I think it's working!!!

Here's what I do every day:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=krEhGok_qpY&feature=youtu.be

So much fun. It's gotta burn some calories too, right?

I Did It!

Not really. Not yet. But I'm practicing my "victory blog entry" for when I DO, because I know I will.

And when I post that blog entry, you will probably want to know how I did it, right? I decided to revert back to what helped me lose the first 12 pounds almost two years ago (wow, has it been that long?). Basic math. With the help of this calculator:

http://nutrition.about.com/library/bl_nutrition_guide.htm

My target range is roughly between 1500 - 2000 calories per day. I don't sweat it if I go over that a few times a week because this range is without exercise and sometimes, I actually do exercise.

It's only been 4 days and I'm down 1.5 pounds, even though my goal is only .5 to 1 pound a week.

I'm eating mostly whole foods again (aka "clean").

Salads like this:

And soups like this:

I keep a bag of frozen uncooked, EZ Peel shrimp in the freezer and when I want a nice salad, I just cook some up with whatever seasoning I feel like. Right now, my mouth is burning off as I type this because I felt like chili! I also do the same with chicken breast.

The soup is a great lentil soup recipe that my friend Liz gave me.

So anyway...that's how I did it! (or will do it) Whatever. Details.

On Track!

Nothing too exciting to report. Today is my official weigh in day and I'm up .5 pound from last week. However, last week I weighed in on Thursday before our Thanksgiving weekend. I'm pretty sure I gained a pound or so over the weekend, so in all actuality, I'm probably down a pound. That's my story and I'm sticking to it!

I'm still on track to lose 16 pounds in 4 months (I did give myself 4 months, didn't I?). That would be a pound a week going forward.

I got this!

No pictures this week, but we had warm salmon nicoise salad (my new favorite salad!), and a wonderful lentil soup for a few nights. I also ate a lot of fresh pineapple, just because.

Ok, today starts week two!

Ok, This Time For Real, I MEAN It, I Am Doing This!

(Nancy totally called my next blog post title!)

How to undo the devastating debauchery of a gluttonous Thanksgiving Week:

1) Eat lots (I mean LOTS) of pineapple - for breakfast, for lunch, for snacks (stealing a small and convenient part of my friend Peg's cleanse)
2) Eat plenty of high protein/high fiber dinners - like my friend Liz' Lentil Soup, (and maybe a salmon nicois salad once or twice for something light and "non-beany")
3) Drink wayyyyy less wine
4) Ride, ride, ride, muck, muck, muck, yoga, yoga, yoga

This will put me back on track for sure!

I mean it this time. 16 pounds in four months. I'm doing it! (I haven't actually weighed myself but I'm assuming I'm up a few and my goal is 148)

We had a great time visiting with family in Bend, Oregon. I packed light - yoga pants and one pair of jeans. By the end of the weekend I could barely zip up my jeans, but whatever (note to self - pack the "comfort" jeans next time, not the "skinny" jeans, duh!).

We went to one of my favorite stores in Bend - Cowgirl Cash - where I picked up a couple of sweet pairs of gently used boots - tax free! One for kickin' around in the barn, and the other for riding in (and kickin' around town). My intention was to buy one pair of boots, but I fell in love with the turquoise Tony Lama "Vaquero" boots and my wonderful husband offered to buy them for me as an early Christmas present! I also got a super cute Cowgirl Cash T-shirt (another early Christmas present) from my sister. I'm so spoiled!!

I ate stuff like this: (my sister in law Nancy made this evil dark chocolate pumpkin swirl cake)

And  it was probably the tastiest Thankgiving Dinner to date. I don't know what it was that made it so special. It was definitely a group effort. My husband and my brother were in charge of the turkey and used Chef Marc's High Heat method.  My nephew Ryan made awesome mashed potatoes with parmesan cheese and fresh rosemary. He used a little sour cream, half and half, and I don't know what else (and I don't want to know!).  My mom's gravy was wonderful, and my niece made sweet potato rolls (yum!). My sister and I tried to make ourselves scarce. Maybe that was it?

I will follow up at the end of the week to let you know how fabulously successful my plan, and new found motivation is working out! : )

But I can't start until Tuesday. Right now I'm eating Jalapeno Artichoke and Fiesta Chicken Crostinis (it's all we have in the freezer)....

Short and Sweet!

It's been over a WEEK since I blogged. But I have stayed on track and I lost a .5 pound, which is better than nothin'!

I'm so busy with the horse. I moved her to a ranch that I LOVE and have been going every day after work and weekends. The barn has lights! Rob is thrilled that he gets to do a lot of undisturbed painting, and I'm just thrilled period!

Here is Maddie in her new digs with a mouthful of food (not unlike her owner most times.....)

Have a happy Thanksgiving!

Farmer's Market Bento Box

I kind of get the Occupy Wall Street movement, but I have to admit that it's a bit overwhelming for me to grasp in it's entirety. I think I would need a double major in Economics and US History, plus I would need to read an unabridged copy of a thorough study of the financial crisis/meltdown (which sounds really depressing and boring) to make complete heads and/or tails of the what and why of everybody's ire. 

I do understand a part of what led to the financial crisis (although maybe "understand" is a stretch); mortgage loans, sold to investors in "tranches" with the AAA rated mortgage loans mixed in with the poorly rated, higher risk loans, converted to MBS (mortgage backed securities), and the debacle that followed when those loans defaulted, investors freaked out, etc). There are so many layers of fault, so many places where the system broke down - government policy, Wall Street, banking giants, etc. And I think that is part of what Occupy is about - starting a dialogue. Raising questions. Holding people accountable. Not just for how it started, but how it was handled after the fact.

Anyway, for the time being, I have to be content with occupying what I know how to occupy....the local Farmer's Market. I've always been an advocate of "local", taking at least my own (miniscule) spending power away from the big corporations and lobbyists, and supporting the local growers. So maybe I am part of the Occupy movement, in my own way. The giant food corporations (I'm assuming) are part of the 1%, right? I can't always do it, but I try to use my purchasing power "for the good", and make food decisions that are responsible as often as I can.

Speaking of food, Rob is not here for dinner. So this is my ideal "Farmer's Market Bento Box" meal! Maybe I should call it a Happy Meal/ It makes me happy to eat it, that's for sure. I wonder if this is why I was so much thinner before I met my husband?

Calamata Olives grown right here in Northern California, organic Brussel Sprouts from the Central Coast, and Smoked Gouda from Oakdale. Call me crazy, but this meal is pure indulgance! I'm sure it tastes better because it's local, but it feels better to.

So, what's my weight? Well, I didn't gain, so that's good! Especially after a week of out of town vistitors, week night parties, dinner out, etc. Could have been worse. Much worse!

Love it, Love it, Love it!

I've been doing a lot of repeats of my favorite "tried and true" recipes lately. I can't help it when I find things I just love! But sometimes you have to make room in your life for new love.

This week, I rediscovered the pure joy of peanut butter, honey and brown sugar on fluffy whole wheat bread. I'm on day two and I don't see an end in sight. I can't imagine becoming tired of these "diabetes squares" as Jacob calls them (oh yes, he's into them now too). Pair it with an apple, and I have a fairly decent, not too terribly unhealthy "desert/lunch".

I also made these:

(not my photo - borrowed from "Eat, Live, Run" blog)

This is a delicious spicy shrimp and goat cheese quesadilla. Super easy to make, and really yummy! Simply saute' some Trader Joe's Fire Roasted Bell Pepper/Onion mix (freezer section), remove from pan, crank up the heat and saute some raw shrimp for about 30 seconds, (while sprinkling with cayenne and chili powder), then layer a tortilla with shredded jack cheese, crumbled goat cheese, pepper mixture, shrimp, 'nother tortilla , and cook in a non-stick pan, flipping once, until done!

I also made this delicious Hearty Black Bean and Chorizo soup from Weight Watchers (I used Soy Chorizo)and served it with Asiago bread from the bakery, sliced and toasted in the oven with cheese.

(I'm sorry, the photo doesn't do it justice, and even if I knew what I was doing with my camera, it would sill look yucky brown and not too appetizing. But IT IS SO GOOD!!! Trust me!)

Fitclub is off to a slow start this week. Apparently the prerequisite of Standard Time was simply an excuse because as I awoke at 6:30 to sunny skies this morning, I pulled the comforter over my head and grumbled something about it being too light for such an ungodly hour. I think I just need a few days to adjust.....

Oh, in a totally unrelated note, did I TELL you that I TRIED ON a pair of OVERALLS finally? Oh Ha ha hahaha HA HA hahaha ha (sob sob). Yeah no.

Wow!!! or "UNCLE!"

Wow, because it's been a month since I decided to end the dieting madness and "just be", and "UNCLE" Because I give!

After the nice break, I realized that sure, I can maintain my weight (more or less) by eating the usual stuff (I'm still a fairly "clean eater"), but I decided that I want the scale to actually move more than I want to eat whatever and whenever I want.

My friend Kristin and I were talking about motivation on one of our hikes last week and how the "apathy vs. action" scale needs to tip sharply in one direction over another in order for us to have a strong enough desire or motivation to do something to change. If we are just sort of dissatisfied, that's not really enough to force us into any action. My scale tipped drastically last week (see last week's post) which created a definite "Call to Action!"

The break was nice, refreshing, just what I needed. But I'm ready to go to work again.

So first I started Fit Club, which is going well. I've walked a couple of times and I hiked once or twice too. But I realized that I need Standard Time so that it's not pitch black outside when I walk in the morning. Niles is nice, but it's no Pleasanton. There is no army of friendly city workers watering the plants that line Main Street in the wee hours. No nice shop owners putting out bowls of water for the dogs who will soon be making their early morning treks downtown. No. I need it to be light out.

Of course the walking is in addition to regular horse back riding and stall mucking which I think should also be considered "exercise". This is Maddie. She's officially mine now. She thinks I'm fabulous the way I am but wouldn't mind if I lost a few pounds either:

I still do yoga almost nightly, plus a weekly "girls night" yoga session that includes wine, stories, laughter and fun.

I went back on Weight Watchers this week and lost 3.5 pounds. Yippee!

17 to go!

Who's That Lady? (No Really, Who The F#&% Is That Lady?!)

Is there a way to listen to this song while reading this post? Isley Bros

(I think you have to open it, then open another window to read my blog while listening. Sorry, that's the extent of the tech support you can expect from Fitwife)

I was getting out of the shower this morning, singing this song to myself, because it's sort of my "anthem", when all of a sudden the phone rings....

Two things happened:

1) Partially dressed, I flew out of the bathroom into the hall where I was savagely accosted by the large closet mirror. Perhaps it was the sunlight streaming through the skylight at an odd and unflattering angle, or the fact that the sunlight was just so....bright, but I literally heard the record scratch to a halt in my head! (if you are playing it, please stop music abruptly here)

2) Horrified, I turned away from the mirror and as I shuffled (lumbered? jiggled?) awkwardly down the hall to the phone, still damp and dumbfounded, I realized that (chuckle) all this time (eye roll followed by chuckle), it's been my clothing keeping all of my parts in place! (chuckle followed by unabashed weeping). Without the secure casing of cotton - I'm a mass of jello.

After speaking with the person on the other end of the line (no, I don't blame you client lady. I hope you find the home of your dreams), barely keeping it together, still dripping, still wearing just my unmentionables, still reeling from the shock of the "full body skylight catastrophe", it hit me...I need to do something.

Welcome to Fitclub!

The first rule of Fitclub....never talk about Fitclub! (wrong club, I just like saying that)

No, this club we can talk about. I emailed and texted my neighbor/girlfriends to see "Who's up for getting up at the crack of freaking dawn-I-don't-care-about-sleep-anymore-'cause-I-just-saw-myself-practically-naked-in-a-full-length-mirror-with-sun-streaming-down-on-me and power walking three miles a day!? Signed, Lardass"

Well - "Junkindatruck" responded that she was definitely interested in talking about it. My other partner in crime has gone MIA. Helloooooo Kristin?!?

Now, I almost texted my friend back with a long winded diatribe about how we "should really be kinder to ourselves and not call ourselves names, what was I thinking, etc. etc.?" but realized: a) how long it would take for me to text that, and b) I don't think there is anything wrong with a little self-deprecating humor (see whole, entire, greatly exaggerated post above). It sure got my butt in gear!

Welcome to Fitclub! (I just really like saying that...If you were in my head listening, it would sound just like Brad Pitt!)

La La La La La La!

That's me. Covering my ears and singing so I can't hear the call of the scale. I don't care. I don't care. I don't care. I'm a little "puffy" this week, if you know what I mean, so there's no sense in making myself more miserable! Besides, "healthy is the new skinny". So says a new Facebook group I "like".

This week we've done a repeat of all of our favorite - Salmon Nicoise Salad, Fish and Potato Bake, Lemon Garlic Shrimp with Asparagus and Bell Pepper. I made bread salad and a really good potato leek soup (with bacon and cream and everything!). I went out for margaritas and Mexican food for my girlfriend's birthday one night and couldn't. Stop. Eating. Hence the puffiness. Or maybe, because of the puffiness. I'm not sure. Anyway - I really regretted it come 3am. I don't think I'll be doing that again for another....month.

The only recipe I made this week that I haven't posted before is the Soyrizo Goat Cheese burritos:

So good! Or should I say "soy" good! Ha ha ha. I'm not usually a big fan of soy, but this stuff is the bomb! Fry it up with scrambled eggs, then pile it in a whole wheat tortilla with some goat cheese, cilantro, avocado, Greek yogurt and hot sauce. Our friend Kris makes this at a lot of our campouts/overnights, and it now makes a regular appearance at our house for dinner!
Soy....that's it for this week!

Picks and Pans OR Where's The Beef!?

This week I had a hankerin' for a "burger". But not the kind that makes the pan look like this:

(Please don't call Child Protective Services! I made a real hamburger for my son because I thought "our version" would be too fancy for him) Ewww!

So, while I clogged my only child's arteries (I promise, I am never doing that again!), we had these healthy Spicy Black Bean Burgers:

(Oopsie, chipped plate! Too hungry to care...)

And the pan looked like this after:

These are the Morning Star Spicy Black Bean burgers (frozen aisle). I'm going to make the home made version this week and I'll let you know how they turn out. But these are pretty gosh darned GOOD!! Seriously, I don't know that I need to eat beef again. For a long while.

As promised last week - I decided to start working through some recipes from the Eat, Live, Run! blog I found (and adore).

First up, the Channa Masala. I learned how to turn these simple ingredients (please ignore the bananas and apples in the background):

Into a fabulous "authentic" Indian dish.

First, caramelize the onion with a TON of garlic and a Jalapeno pepper"

I learned the meaning of "Pince" (pronounced "Pince-SAY"). It's when you smush down the stuff in the pan that is mixed with the tomato paste and let it set awhile to burn off the excess sugars from the paste. I was informed that if you DON'T, you may as well toss out the dish, it's ruined. Your life is over. Here is a picture of me "Pince-SAY-ing":

This is the finished product:

 It was really good, super easy, and pretty authentic tasting. I live in FREMONT. I know Indian food!



Of the recipes I made this week from the Eat, Live, Run! website, this next one was my favorite. Remember last week when I said I found the holy grail of cream sauce? I lied. This week I found the holy grail of cream sauce. And yes, it has cream in it. It changed my life. Cream and tomatoes, that's IT. Magic:

Linguine and Shrimp in Tomato Cream Sauce - so simple, so basic, so delicious!! (that's "chiffonaded" Basil on top...I know, fancy!)

I only have one "pan" this week. Unfortunately, it was when my friend Laura was over and I attempted to WOW! with a new Goat Cheese Portobello Sammie recipe. Um. Sorry. No. It was a bit too mushroomy for me. I have two other recipes that I love that I think are better. But I am not deterred, I will continue to try the other recipes I find here on Jenna's blog: http://www.eatliverun.com/about/ 

(Look, La! It didn't even make it to the white plate for the optimal yum-factor photo!)



Finally - I don't really do breakfast, unless it's bacon, with a side of bacon, and maybe toast with bacon on top (I actually do yogurt and granola most days, but weekends are all about the bacon!).  Rob is truly the master breakfast chef in our house. Too bad he eats it alone. Good thing I'm there with my camera and support. Gooooo Rob!!

I don't eat 'em, but his eggs sure look perfect every time!

I lost another pound. I haven't had beef in two weeks except once and it made me sick. I think I'm over it. The End.

The Girl's Gone Wild!

So what did I eat once all restrictions were removed? What did I crave? Surprisingly, it wasn't the cheesy, buttery, bacon-y trifecta I thought it would be. No. At the risk of sounding trite, although that's never stopped me before, when left to my own devices, all I really wanted was good old fashioned wholesome foods. I craved greens and beans, fish and fresh fruit all week. I'm not joking.


This is my "Week in Food".


This salad was my absolute favorite of the week and I can't wait to make it again! A Warm Salmon Nicoise with fresh green beans (lightly steamed), hard boiled egg, and capers. The dressing was a red wine-Dijon mustard vinaigrette. The sweet of the salmon, combined with the tart of the dressing is pure mouth joy!

(Recipe courtesy of Weight Watchers)

Next, we managed to live on this Turkey Kielbasa and White Bean soup for three days. It was nice and hearty for the chilly evenings we had. But I was done after day three. I'm not sure if I can eat another bean for awhile (Except for the Spicy Black Bean Burgers we're making tonight!):

(Again - Weight Watchers recipe. I love their recipes!)

People - I discovered the "Holy Grail" of healthy sauces. No lie. This is a Lemon-Garlic Shrimp with Asparagus, Red Bell Pepper and Mushrooms. I found this recipe on the Eating Well website. The vegetables are prepared with olive oil and lemon zest, the sauce is lemon juice, lots of parsley, LOTS of garlic, a cup of low sodium organic chicken broth and a teaspoon of corn starch. It gives the mouth feel of a cream sauce, but with no cream (not that there's anything wrong with cream!). I will be making this again - with shrimp, with chicken, with whatever!

Last night's dinner was one of my favorite "comfort food" recipes. Really easy; roasted red onion and potatoes with a little olive oil and salt, add the Tilapia and tomatoes, roast some more. Yum! It looks a hot mess, but it's delicious. I make it at least a couple of times a month:

(another WW recipe!)

I stumbled across this blog the other day: http://www.eatliverun.com/recipes/  I will be trying many of these! She is a girl after my own heart - simple recipes, fresh ingredients, but with the occasional "canned something" to make it do-able on a week night!

Ok - so that is me going wild. Maybe next week I'll take butter baths and frolic in chocolate chip bouncy houses, but don't hold your breath!

In Case You're Wondering.....

I lost 3 pounds this week doing "Nothing".

A few observations:

I feel much more relaxed about food. I've even re-introduced myself to the joys of peanut butter! I think I may even be eating less now that the restrictions are off, but of course I wouldn't know. I'm letting go of the need to know. I'm trying to wing it.

I'm just not that hungry anymore. Before, I would feel an almost "anguished" kind of hunger all the time: "What will I eat??? WHAT CAN I EAT?!" What could I eat that wouldn't make me more hungry, guilty, or fat, a weak-willed failure? The simple question of what I could eat was loaded. I wonder if much of my hunger was psychological. Yes? 

Don't get me wrong, I still love food! I love to shop for it, I love to cook it, and I love to eat it! But I'm trying to quiet down a bit and listen to what my body is telling me. "What do you want, Sunshine? I'll give you anything you want. No judgement, no guilt!" And I hear the words of Michael Pollan in my head: Eat food, not too much, mostly plants.

I think I've got it now.....

The Good News Is....

I have 8 full months before swimsuit season.

I didn't even bother weighing in or blogging last Friday because I knew I was up a pound or two. Then we went camping and ate and drank...a lot. So it just got worse.

As I mentioned before, I have 8 full months before swimsuit season and instead of waiting until January to make a resolution to "Get fit and trim, for real this time", I'm going to start October with a new kind of resolution. I'll call it my "New Revolution Resolution".

You know that old saying: "If you keep doing what you've always done, you'll keep getting what you've always gotten"? Well, I feel like I'm living that adage. I'm like a hamster on a hamster wheel. Working hard and going nowhere. I'm exhausted. I don't know why I keep doing the same thing but expecting a different result. I'm going to try something different (big surprise there).

That something is...."Nothing". It's all the rage.

I read in an article that recent studies have shown that the best way to stay trim and fit is to make sure you never gain weight to begin with. Losing weight is really that hard. The next article I read mentioned a new study that shows that tracking what we eat is an excellent way to become aware of what we're eating and to keep us accountable, however it often causes undue stress which can lead to feelings of guilt and over-eating. It's a great tool for people who aren't really cognizant of their eating habits, and where they go wrong.

The thing is, I know where I go wrong. I don't need to shout it from the roof tops! (ie write it down) I don't have to track to "become aware of my eating habits", I already know my eating habits. I track consistently for a few days, staying "accountable" and in the "guilt free" points zone, eating mostly healthfully.  Then I'll over-indulge, feel too guilty to track it, and, well, since my tracker is now completely falsified, I'll just give up for a few days. During the "giving up" period, it's a free for all. It's a "break" so I better take advantage of it. This is the hamster wheel. This keeps me at at or near my current weight, but never allows me to lose anything substantial.

I decided to start a one woman revolution and just do "Nothing". It's kind of like one of those "sit ins" they did in the 60's. Those hippies were on to something. They could do nothing but sit (strategically) and change the world forever. I'm going to start doing Nothing (strategically) today!

My hope is that by doing "Nothing", I can reset my body and mind back to the factory default setting. What would that look like? What is my default setting? I think it's me enjoying food but not thinking overmuch about it. Eating to nourish my body, not to punish or reward. No guilt trippy binges followed by head trippy quinoa and kale fasts.

I decided to try doing "Nothing" today. Just...you know...whatevs. Food...meh. I was surprised with how "less fixated" on food I am already. Instead of starting the day in a slight panic worrying that I'll blow my points by lunch and I'll be done for, I just ate. I had yogurt and fruit for breakfast, a sandwich and apple chips for lunch (omg...a sandwich! With bread! And CHEESE on it), and I'm having warm salmon nicoise salad for dinner. I snacked on some strawberries a little while ago. It's all I had in the fridge. I'm not panicked AT ALL. I'm not tracking, I'm not counting, I'm just eating like a normal person. I feel liberated. And also super cool and hip.

I'm going to just do "this" for a while and not worry about it. I love Weight Watchers, and I firmly believe that it works. But I just need a break. I want to not think about food "in that way" anymore and just live my life and eat the healthy foods I love, and occasionally the foods I love to indulge in. And if I stay the same weight, it won't be because I'm a  failure. If I don't lose weight, it's because I'm 43 and I let myself gain 20 pounds and now I'm eating healthfully but not starving.

We'll see how it goes. I'm excited to start this revolution!

I Can Do This

I got back on track...just like I said I would! I did yoga several times this week, I'm hiking today, I shoveled plenty of horse manure, swam a bit, and I tracked what I ate (mostly). I lost 3 of the 5 pounds I gained. Yayyyyy me!

So I'll just do more of the same and see if my progress continues.

I ate a lot more vegetables this week.

Broccoli stir fry (two nights)
Sauteed mustard greens over quinoa with grated parmesan and toasted pine nuts (three lunches)
Soy chorizo/egg burritos with goat cheese, cilantro and avocado (ok, not a lot of vegetables here, but delicious!)
Fish and Vegetable bake tonight!

I'll try to remember to take pictures again so that my blog can be more colorful!

Confessions of a Party Girl

This week I'm going to eat vegetables over brown rice every night for dinner. I'm hiking, dammit, and I'm doing yoga EVERY day.

That's all I'm going to say on the matter.

Ok, I'll come clean. Two Mexican Fiestas, a Chinese Buffet, a Camp Out with decadent food and adult beverages being the focus, no time for hiking, yoga, etc. = Holy Crap! I gained 5 pounds.

One would think that shoveling horse poop almost every day would whittle one down to nothing. But it appears that the fresh air and manure management only stoked my appetite. This week is all about damage control and hopefully getting myself back into healthier habits again. It's amazing how easy it is to fall off the wagon. But I can get back on it. Starting now...I'm going to hit "save", then "exit", then go do yoga.

7 Links

The folks over at Tripbase.com started this endeavor so we’d have a chance to look back on some of our older posts and learn a thing or two. The way it works is a blogger posts 7 links from the archives he/she finds most fitting for each of the categories. Then, at the end five more bloggers are “nominated” and they do the same. It’s already been spreading like crazy through the blogosphere.

I was tagged by my friend from way back in Junior High - Peg Nichols Peter - an ex-pat living in Brazil with her Scottish husband. She writes about everything - her kids, learning Portuguese, her travels, the duality of her life in Houston and Brazil. It's fun (and a little addictive) to read her humorous and insightful commentary on all the things she encounters and experiences in her extraordinary life. Her blog is The Tao of Me. Check it out!

Here are the seven posts I selected for the challenge:

Most Beautiful Post: Buddha Because I talk about my grandmother. And I think everyone is beautiful.

Most Popular Post: Buddhist Wedding Vows  This one is interesting. It's now #1 - #3 (depending on the day) in Google searches for "Buddhist Wedding Vows" of "Buddhist Marriage Ceremony". It's had close to 3,000 views from all over the world. From Oslo, Norway to South Africa and every place in between. I've had several people leave comments and it appears to be helpful, so...mission accomplished!

Most Controversial Post: But What About Filipe? Ok, ok. I know I'm just small potatoes, and I don't know if "controversial" is the right word here since there is nothing controversial about it, these are known facts, but it kind of freaked me out when this blog entry got picked up by a web crawler employed by a very large food corporation. No Cease and Desist letters were received though, so I'm good. Small potatoes, like I said.

Most Helpful Post: Actual Real Life Letter From A Blog Reader! Here I share 5 tips guaranteed to help you lose weight. Look how well it's worked for me! LOL!

And now I'm going to break the rules and post my 2nd Most Helpful Post: Mirror Mirror At The Mall Because when the 5 tips above don't work, this blog entry shared my tips for finding the best jeans to make your butt look smaller.

And I'm REALLY breaking the rules by posting the 3rd Most Helpful Post: The Long Version of My FB Status Because if the above referenced blogs are not helpful to you, then screw it.  Nature is perfect in it's imperfection...and so are we!

A post whose success surprised you: For Lack of Anything Profound, Bacon. The positive feed back I got on this post completely surprised me. I thought it was THE dumbest blog post entry EVER. I felt I had nothing to write, and just sort of "brain vomited" onto the keyboard. I almost didn't post it. But you know what? It holds up. I can read it again now and "get it". I still feel the same way. It was just honest "what's on my mind" writing. And the poem isn't so bad either. Lol!

A post you feel didn’t get the attention it deserved: No, Really. Where Is The Normal Person's Large? Because people should be more outraged.

The post that you are most proud of:  The Flip Side  I'm most proud of this post because I almost didn't post it at all. It's a very personal blog entry, and the one thing I've always hated about writing, even when I was in college majoring in it, was the fact that you have to share your most inner personal feelings. People will see your most personal self. If you don't, your writing will be hollow. It won't ring true. So I'm proud of this one because I overcame my fear and just posted it.


My nominations go to: Ramon Shiloh's Lame Ass Blog Because maybe it will get him to write more?

And that's IT! I don't have anyone else who I know who actually blogs regularly who I am also Facebook friends with and can post this on their wall!

Week Two and OMG...What Have I Done?

Did you know that butterflies weigh approximately .3 grams? This means that a stomach full of them can conspire to halt any weight loss progress. That's ok, I held steady this week - no gain or loss. I was just too  EXCITED to care!

Remember last week I looked at this horse:

And I said: "She's not exactly for sale, but I have a feeling that might change...."?  Sometimes I think I live an extraordinarily serendipitous life. Maybe it's just simple intuition, which I believe is nothing more than extreme confidence in one's "gut feeling". It just seems like whenever I decide I should "do" something, it's not really me deciding it at all! That "something" is already out there, and I'm powerless against it's pull. Sometimes I don't even know why I'm doing what I'm doing...driving somewhere, looking for something...my intellectual brain shuts off, I get really emotional and kind of "scatterred and focused" at the same time, and I find myself being navigated by "something else". Has that ever happened to any of you? It's really weird and kind of freaky. Anyway - it seems as if the stars align, something powerful is set in motion, and I just roll on to something wonderful. This horse is one of those "something wonderful"s. 

My friend Linda and I were looking at a few boarding stables together, checking out some horses, etc. I saw three or so horses, and I had about three or so more that I wanted to see over the course of the next week. One day, on a lark, (or whatever you want to call it), I randomly drove up to the Rocking S Ranch, which is just a few miles from my house, but not a place I was considering boarding my "future horse". I asked the owner if she knew of any horses for sale or lease. She said there might be one, (Maddie), and I could go take a look while she called the owner. She pointed me in the right direction and off I went.

As I approached the pasture, I heard a soft nicker, and Maddie came ambling over to say hello. She was so sweet. She had a fly mask on and I wanted to see her eyes, so I lifted one corner....and then I fell in love. I actually had tears in my eyes. It's hard to explain. But there was an instant connection, like magic.

I walked back up and waited for Maddie's owner to arrive. His name is Cris, a super nice guy who clearly loves his horses. "She's not for sale." he told me. "But I might consider a lease."  He invited me out on a trail ride. Between him and his partner, they have 8 horses together. Quite a lot for two people to handle, hence the possibility of a lease (I would pay him a fee and take care of his horse. In return...I get to take care of his horse.)

Maddie was exquisite on the trail. Only 6 years old and still in a bosal (a very light bridle, just a nose band, no bit in her mouth). She was responsive, engaged, and absolutely enjoying the ride. Cris told me that she had a few behaviors to watch out for: she may kick a horse if it's too close behind her, she may try to "turn short" or too quickly on some of the trail branches because she thinks she knows the way, she may try to run up the hill at the end of the trail, etc. I kept hearing him behind me say "Huh." as she failed to exhibit any of these behaviors. And it's a good thing she didn't, because our partnership out on the trail must have impressed Cris in some way. He told me he might consider selling her. Whooo hoooo! One step closer.

We parted ways with the understanding that I still had a few horses I was going to look at, I wanted to make sure I wasn't falling for the first pretty girl I see. Cris was going to consider things. We would touch base in a week. I told him - "I want to be completely honest with you. I love this horse and I know you do too. You need to know that if you ever do decide to sell her to me, I will probably move her to another boarding facility."  I worried a little bit that I might be blowing my chances, he would have a hard time saying good bye to this horse, but I also realized that, of course I wasn't blowing anything. And I owed him the courtesy of full disclosure.

By that evening, Maddie was my screen saver. She was my Facebook profile picture, I couldn't stop looking at her pictures, I couldn't stop talking about her. I was emotional and in awe. I tried to look at other horses the next day and my car broke down and had to be towed. I had a dream that night that I was walking Maddie into an arena, I saw a piece of paper fluttering around on the ground and bent over to pick it up. It had Cris' phone number on it and in bold print, it said "CALL".

So I called the next day. Do you know what Cris said? "I thought it over, and I decided to lease her to you for 60 days, and if it's really a match, which I already know it is, I will sell her to you." He said that what convinced him was how I responded to her, and she to me. That, and how he thought it was just "too weird" that he hadn't been planning on leasing or selling her, but he just happened to get this phone call one day that there was a lady at the ranch who wanted his horse......Yes, Cris. It's weird. That's how the magic happens!

I signed the lease last night.



Week One and Horsin' Around

Week one went well!

I lost 1.5 pounds. That's a start in the right direction. I only went over my points by about 50 (geez, imagine if I didn't go over!).

This was the only picture I remembered to take:

Chicken Salad on toasted Ciabata with a side of Kale chips!

In other news - Jacob started 7th grade and managed to navigate the public bus system! So far, he really likes it. He's growing up! Which made me realize....it's time. Time to get another horse (I know, where did that come from?). It's been 7 years since I had to put my beloved mare "Mandy" down. We had 22 wonderful years together! I still miss her. But......I started to think....why not get another one?

So I'm on a quest. I've got a great partner in crime. My friend Linda, who was my original partner in crime some 30+ years ago (we got our first ponies together when we were 10), has two horses and is offering me her guidance and expertise.

I cannot believe how much things have changed in the years I've been out of the horse world. The board is twice as expensive, but the horses sure aren't. Every boarding facility I check out has horses for lease, or sale...cheap...because the owners can no longer afford them, don't have the time to care for them, are getting divorced, etc. It's making me a little nervous. Am I doing the right thing? Maybe it's not the right time. But I have the fever, and I don't know if I can stop this train, even if I wanted to.

I guess a horse is a luxury. I never really thought of it that way. I remember it being a lot of work and expense, but the reward is immeasurable. People are crazy about their horses for a reason. There is nothing like looking into the eyes of your equine partner and seeing the trust and love (that they make you work for) reflected back at you. There is nothing like knowing your horse will do anything you ask of him or her, because you've earned their trust. Horses are used in therapy for a reason.

I didn't realize how badly I missed Mandy until Linda and I drove down the long gravel driveway to my old boarding stable. There was a quarter horse for sale that we wanted to check out. I don't know what came over me, but as soon as we started down that drive way I just lost it. The last time I made that drive, it was to say good bye to my best friend. I drove away a sad wreck and haven't stepped foot on a ranch since.

I had that horse through my pre-teens, teens, young adulthood, and into my motherhood years. She was a constant in my life (sometimes the only constant) for as long as I can remember. There were periods when I didn't have the time or money to care for her like I should have. But the promises that a little girl makes to her horse are not made lightly "Mandy, you are mine forever, I will never sell you, I will never abandon you." And I didn't. She was 36 when I put her down, which is very very old for a horse. I hadn't ridden her in at least 5 years because of her age. But I would go up and give her treats, groom her, and sometimes take naps laying on her back like I did when I was a kid.

It seems like looking at horses again is allowing me to properly grieve for my old one (considering that I had to take a break from typing to go dry my eyes). I think I'll be ready for my next forever horse soon. She's on her way to me, I know it.

It could be this little gal. Such a sweet heart, I just love her. I can't stop thinking about her or looking at her pictures. But I want to make sure I check out all my options and don't fall for the first pretty girl that comes along!

This is Madelyn, a 6 year old Walkaloosa (Tennessee Walking Horse and Appaloosa)

She is incredibly sweet and a pleaser. She's great out on the trail and just loves to be loved. Not a mean bone in her body. That's what I want. She's just what I want. She's not exactly for sale. But I have a feeling that might change....

For Realsies This Time!!

You may recall that in my July 1st post, I decided, after 18 months of various twists, turns, experiments, and road blocks, that the winning-est weight loss program for me was Weight Watchers, but with my own personal twist, of course.

Then I managed to spend the next two months vacationing, camping, partying, crafting, meditating, road tripping, basically everything but focusing on my weight. Was it refreshing? Not as refreshing as I hoped it would be. Self-acceptance is for the birds.

Seriously though, I did keep up the with the basics of my "feel good" routine - lots of yoga, some swimming, healthy eating for the most part. Every once in a while, I'd have a knee jerk reaction and go "full protein!" for a week, or half heartedly "start tracking" again. Momentarily.

Old habits die hard.

The good news - I didn't re-gain all of the 12 pounds it took me a year to lose during my two month "dieting hiatus" - maybe just 5 pounds.

So now that vacation season is over, I'm back on track. And for real this time. Oh, and not with my "own twist" (That so doesn't work! It cracks me up that I keep trying to whine and wheedle my way out of following the rules and putting forth the effort required to get the results I claim to want so badly!)

Enough of that.

I'm following the rules and sticking to the program. I started this past Monday, but today is day one of my first "full week" back on track. I managed to lose two of the five pounds I gained over the past couple of months. It kind of pisses me off that I still have another week or two to go just to get back to where I was. Oh well. Lesson learned!

Goal Weight: 140
Current Weight: 161 (sigh)

The Plan: Weight Watchers
Key Words: Yoga, Hiking, Walking, Meditating, Clean Eating, Fresh Produce, Lean Protein, Cooking, Loving Myself As I Am Every Step Of The Way But Also Loving Myself Enough To Give Myself The Gift Of Being My Best.

Whew.

Oh...a side note. I cut my own hair again! Into a shorter "pixie" cut. I think I may A) Get a Flowbee hair cutting system or B) Just go pay for a fucking hair cut already!

Quickie! (AKA Epic Road Trip Part 1)

I've got five minutes for a quick blog post!

I think our road trip to Seattle and Bend can be considered "epic" for many reasons, and as such, it deserves it's own photo montage, set to music, of course. But in the meantime, here's a quick breakdown.

First stop, Grants Pass and the Hellgate Canyon Jet Ski Excursion on the Rogue River. Super fun...If you ever drive through  the area, I highly recommend this! The photos make it look tame, but the jet boats can fly across water just 6 inches deep, they can go up rapids and they can hit 80 MPH (or is it 50...).  The 360's are also fun. Wet..but fun!

Next, we pulled into Portland on the way to Seattle and had dinner at McCormick and Schmicks. Not bad for a chain restaurant, although the scenery was probably better than the food (we dined outdoors on the patio overlooking the harbor). We both ordered the Lobster Trio:

And on to Seattle! Besides being a super cool place that contains some of my most favorite people on earth, the delicious food inspired me to return to the Farmers Market this Saturday and get back to clean eating. I'm only up a couple of pounds from when I left, and I think that's mostly due to the Moussakas at Yanni's in Seattle and the Pizza and Beer of 10 Barrel in Bend. Other than that....I kept my wits about me.

(10 Barrel Brewing Co. Bend, Or)

Can I just mention coffee? Seattle makes the best coffee EVER. Grateful Bread and All City Coffee were a few of the places we tried. There were more, but the names escape me now. If I lived in Seattle, I would be drinking way too much coffee! I would also have beautiful skin and clown hair.

(All City Coffee in the Georgetown District of Seattle)

(Cute sign I saw at another coffee shop in Ballard)

(My sister in law Nancy - we walked to Grateful Bread one morning - and me with glowing skin and clown hair.)

We sailed in the Puget Sound!

(An "artsy" photo - I think Rob took this shot.)

My brother and I flew in a 1940 open cockpit bi-plane (yeah, I know...ME!). I have a certificate to prove it! I don't know what came over me, but (in part) the thought of wearing a bomber jacket and a leather helmet with goggles....I just HAD to! Isn't she a beauty?

(My brother, Art. Doesn't he look like a pilot?)

(Wait a minute! Is that a zip tie???!?)

(My old neighborhood!)

We visited with friends and family, created some great meals and memories. It was fantastic!

(Captain Nancy)

(Rob, Ramon & Dawn)

And I have to mention somewhere in here, that while cooking at home, especially with good friends, is my favorite...and the Gorgonzola chicken, Bread Salad, and grilled vegetables with a loganberry reduction we made at Ramon and Dawn's was mouth watering...and my sister in law's eggplant, basil sandwiches on rustic baguette were delicious...my absolute favorite would have to be the Cuban sandwiches from Paseo's across from the Shilshole Marina in Seattle:

(No sandwich image available due to the speed at which they were consumed.)

It was time to leave the Emerald City and it's endless offering of exquisite Coffee, Pastries, Foodies, Friends, and Family. It was with sadness, but also excitement, that we travelled on to Bend, Oregon - land of tax free shopping, outdoor adventure, and fun! We did some camping on Wickiup Reservoir, where we just drove up to a "primitive" campsite on the water and set up camp! For FREE!

(The view from our tent.)

We even did a little bit of "extreme" geocaching (in swimsuits and flip flops, not recommended!).

We had some great times with Emily and Glen's friends Jimmy and Joy. They have a game room with ping pong, hoola hoop, pool, Centipede, Darts, Rock 'em Sock 'em, Hungry Hungry Hippo, and a random game from the 60's called "Swivel":

And I would be remiss if I did not take advantage of the EXCELLENT consignment stores in Bend (seriously...they rock!). And no tax? I found a "gently used" pair of J Crew brown leather riding boots for $40!!! Here's me happy:

Of course all good things must come to an end. So long Bend, Oregon...time to head back to California...